Friday, 31 August 2012

Life, interrupted again.

I know ...

It's been a challenging few weeks days.

I've had moments when I have felt so sad but had no-one to turn to. My resilience tank is running on empty.

Overwhelmed ! I can't say too much here.

My Life , a wild, scary roller-coaster ride ...not much coasting along, though lots of screams.

It is two weeks since my 2nd Chemo and I'm on the countdown to my 3rd cycle next Friday. Physically, I feel better and less weary.

I've got chemo brain memory loss, and now missed the same appointment twice with Speech therapist at Community Health Centre. I haven't the courage to call and apologise a 2nd time ...yet.

I'm not a hypochondriac but every twinge and little pimple or bump thing has me worried.

Now, I am bald, I feel very self conscious and uncomfortable in social situations ... kind of does my hair look alright - sans hair !

I'm nervous about driving and my confidence in everything is shaken. I can't really explain it.

I've yet to be fitted for proper breast prosthesis .The time is nie , now my scars are healing. A private fitting is being organised. I still don't know what clothes I can wear, when winter clothes won't hide cover me up. I threw out 4 bags of clothes the other day.

Yesterday, was the second time I've worn a bra (in over 9wks), with soft 'stuffing' ,because my friend encouraged me to go to the gym. It was good to get back into it but daunting.

I am still paranoid people are looking weirdly at me  giving me the once over, twice !! 

I found this post by SULEIKA JAOUAD ~ Six Ways to cope with Cancer very enlightening and helpful

This is not me but it is the same scarf

The bright spot that made me grateful this week was receiving a beautiful care package of some gorgeous headscarves from the sister of one of my readers, M. I'll tell you more about Lily in another post. Lily, also cheered me up when she called me too on the weekend.

this one too -
I still have to learn to tie the scarves, fashionably, and work around the interference with my BAHA hearing aid. The friction of the fabric covering it makes white noise or squeals but it isn't too unbearable once I get it positioned right.

I get 'sore' ears though from having my ears wrapped up/ when you've been too long on the phone.

Today, I am also reflecting on 8yrs ago when I was induced to give birth to my daughter, Charlotte, born still, the next day.

Grief ; it's so complex. I'm still trying to absorb it into my life . I know it has changed me as a person. Interrupted and changed my whole life in fact. My whole circle of friends. A new online community and some of whom became real life friends as dear as any I have known for years.

What do you know this week ?

Things I Know 150x150

Update - The Speech therapist called me , I'm so grateful she is very understanding ; )

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

Wordless Wednesday ~ A big Thank you

A beautiful handmade gift from Anorina ~ Samelia's Mum

Sunday, 26 August 2012

Windows of happiness - Pink Mummy

Who is Pink Mummy - she is a my hero and she made me happy !

I love to have go and hearing of others giving it go for charity fundraising .

I considered it quite a personal achievement of mine , to complete the City to Surf  2 weeks ago. Most especially raising $1050 for World Vision (...has it only been that long.)

I saw a tweet in my twitter stream last night that caught my eye PINK MUMMY !

I was intriguedMichelle was putting a call out for sponsors to support her 10km run in Bridge to Brisbane.

It all started when the Pink Mummy took on hawt  Pro Wrestlers at Club Chermside…She is quite a celebrity in Brisbane and Gold Coast

I was touched . I had to give her a shout out.

Michelle is running for a cause that is now very close to my heart... The National Breast Cancer Foundation Australia.

NBCF is the leading community-funded national organisation in Australia raising money for research into prevention and cure of breast cancer.

Since the NBCF was established in 1994, over $74 million has been awarded to Australian based researchers across every state and territory, to improve the health and wellbeing of those affected by breast cancer*.
Research programs funded by the NBCF cover every aspect of breast cancer, from increasing understanding of genetics to providing better treatments and improving ways to support women and their families.

The NBCF relies entirely on corporate and community support to continue its work.

You can place your pledge at Everyday hero , remember even $5 or $10 donations will help her reach her $1000 target. You will make her happy too !

*14,000 women will be diagnosed with Breast cancer this year !

Next year I plan to run City to Surf for NBCF too.

Windows of Happiness

Saturday, 25 August 2012


I love reading billboard signs  - there are so many clever ads and slogans.

Forgot about morning breath !


Punishment or reward ?

Funny and serious.

I Love Kermit
Short and sweet.


*This isn't a sponsored post -I just think it is fun idea so I decided to share it with you - from the LEGO Festival of Play as the 50th anniversary celebrations continue.

You can now submit a personal message you would like to see built with a custom-made giant LEGO letters and displayed on a special LEGO Builtboard for all to see.

Brisbane will be abuzz as a giant double-sided 4m tall x 5m wide LEGO Builtboard is installed in King George Square, Brisbane from August 29 – September 2.

You can submit a message (up to 36 characters long) at - NOW , so get your thinking caps on! There’s limited spots and only the most unique will secure a space.

Each message will be hand built by LEGO Certified Professional, Ryan McNaught, who will be on site every day spelling out your message. The LEGO letters are approximately 80cm tall, and are made out of hundreds of LEGO bricks in white, yellow, blue, green and red. 
Whether it's a declaration of love, a happy birthday message or a big announcement – GO say it in LEGO!

These are 2 - I did for hubby 

Keep calm – let’s do the time warp again

Keep Calm – you only stepped on Lego

The Surprise Beginning
PS : * I do have a Lego giveaway coming up soon !

Thursday, 23 August 2012

Thankful for Daffodil Day

Daffodil Day  is the largest fundraising event of its kind in the Southern Hemisphere and a day all Australians unite and lend their support to the fight against cancer.

I am thankful today for the Cancer Council for the support they gave us , for my husband (2yrs ago) and now myself , and my SIL's mum.

August 26th will also be 7th Anniversary since I lost my Dad to side effects of Leukemia ...a blood cancer.

With one in two Australians diagnosed with cancer by 85, there’s every chance your life will be affected. No matter who you are, Daffodil Day is for you.

The Daffodil Garden

1. Beginnings. . ., 2. Daffodils., 3. daffodils in window, 4. Shine on you crazy diamond, 5. a moment of joy, 6. 03Apr18 Daffs, 7. Daffodils in Skagit Valley, 8. Daffodils, 9. Early Narcissus

Grow Hope This Daffodil Day

Daffodil Day, is tomorrow - Friday 24th August, every daffodil and every donation grows hope. 

Hope for better treatments, hope for more survivors and hope for a cancer-free future. Help us beat cancer.

 Your support will make a difference for cancer patients and their families all over Australia.

$5 can help us give a newly diagnosed cancer patient important support and information resources to help them through their cancer journey.

$10 can help offer free exercise programs to help cancer patients build strength and fitness during and after treatment.

$25 can help transport cancer patients to and from hospital for treatment.

$50 can help the Cancer Council Helpline 13 11 20 provide free and confidential information and support on all aspects of cancer.

$100 can help provide free accommodation to cancer patients, their families and carers during treatment.

$500 can help fund ground-breaking research into new and better ways to prevent, diagnose and treat cancer.
So tomorrow on Daffodil Day please make a donation, buy a badge, pen, bear ,balls or even torch.
Brighten your day or a friend's by buying some daffodils & wear something yellow  :)

Thankful Thursday

Wednesday, 22 August 2012

Wordless Wednesday ~ Missing Home

Straight from LG Phone Camera - 8am ~ Winter Morn at Front gate

Tuesday, 21 August 2012

This goes with hat

I'm told that a fashionable hat is one of most attractive accessories at any time and is a necessity in a modern wardrobe. 
Now that I'm almost bald I need to not only protect my head from the sun but also feel like I look reasonable in head gear. I will wear scarves too but I'll need something to cover my ears and face a little more outside. Hats are fun and funky too.
Black hats are 'an ideal accessory for those who are very confident and strong. If a woman likes wearing black hats in her daily life, it means that she is extremely confident in everything. Thus, black hats have become more and more popular in fashion world.'

Yesterday I was lucky to pick up 3 hats from Myer for $45 - Black $15 (originally $29.95) The Myer lady was lovely and told me I needed some colour so I also got a  red  $25 (originally $59.95)

Cream Straw/ Shell paper was $5 (originally $29.95)

I am still thinking about a grey...

I'm also interested on Cloche hats circa 1920's and something like this for fun...

Do you wear hats ?

Monday, 20 August 2012

2 months on

It is 2 months today since my surgery for my double mastectomy , where has the time gone ? I can hardly remember before BC.

I have two down, of 16 chemotherapy cycles, to be followed by 17 treatments of 3 weekly Herceptin for the duration of 12 months.

I am now 3 days past chemo #2 . My main side effects are nausea, and feeling repulsive for the first week.They changed my anti nausea medication slightly but somehow I wasn't given the right amount of pills when I left Friday. It was too late when I realised Saturday morning.

It's ok. I am coping , just enough. I do things I need to do and I keep busy. I feel better being distracted than sitting around. I am not an invalid or really unwell. I just feel repulsive on and off. I can't even sit still to read and comment as much as I would like.

It has been such a blergh day , hard to concentrate ... 'meh' who cares. I ran errands this morning , organised new glasses for Sam and other mundane stuff. Homework from school with my boys.The school has been great supplying worksheets.I also baked brownies and made soup.

We had to stay a few days longer in Sydney this time . I hate the boys missing school but my husband had to work a few days (we have to eat) and I can't be home alone 350kms away.

By evening I tired, bone tired . I can barely keep my eyes open but I do. If I go to sleep too early I am wide awake at 1am.2am.3am ...

I won't bore you with all the side effects.

Today , this afternoon , I walked on the treadmill for the first time since last Wednesday. I think it helps with the fatigue and for me to sleep better. I still wake every night and I rely on sleeping pills to go back to sleep.

Else, I lie there (tossing more like it), worrying , planning , worrying , thinking about not sleeping and getting through the next day.

Tomorrow I'm looking forward to catching up with a friend, our boys were at playgroup together the last 4 yrs. They all started kinder this year.

She was diagnosed with breast cancer a month prior to me. She just finished chemo # 3. We will compare notes, ideas and head gear for almost bald heads. She was quite sick after her first chemo cycle.

I live too far away now on Nude Nutt Farm, 350 km too far, for catchups with friends, any, let alone someone who gets it.

Bring it on.

My apologies for grammar and errors , whatever , like I said Chemo brain is real.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Saturday, 18 August 2012

Joyville ~ New Cadbury Chocolate Mousse {+ Giveaway x 5 }

If you have too little in the way of willpower I warn you to steer clear !

The latest launch in Cadbury Dairy Milk Mousse flavour variants is Double Chocolate and Raspberry Coulis ~ especially for women ~  such delicious little pillow shaped bites of nom nom melt-in-the-mouth goodness.

Let's just say I didn't can't stop at one piece of the newest addition to my long list of favourite Cadbury chocolate varieties. My DH was partial to a few pillows too.

I was sent one of each block to enchant me try ...even wrapped so creatively in coloured layers !

The raspberry coulis combines a layer of smooth, oozing raspberry encased in soft textured mousse and milk chocolate.

The double choc is chocolate mousse with a chocolate flavoured coulis. Both divine flavours produce a unique* taste sensation.

I don't know why they have a new resealable pack ? Well they do , to enjoy some now and some later ! Perfect treat to spoil or indulge (while hiding in the pantry) oneself with.

If you could share a Cadbury Dairy Milk block with anyone (or not) , who would it be / why ?
It is so delicious you might not want to share ...
The 5 winning comments - most original , entertaining or unique will win 2 blocks = one of each new flavour ! 
Australian resident /addresses only .

Extra entries if you tweet or Facebook tagging My Little Drummer Boys and leaving a valid comment but not just to say you tweeted or FB.
Closes Friday 31st August 2012.
Winners will be contacted by email and announced on this post.

PS: *Seriously, they also used titillate but I refuse too ; ) - I couldn't very well truthfully verify this claim.

The Surprise Beginning

Thursday, 16 August 2012

Thankful for simple things

I am thankful for the simple things today.

I just returned from dropping the boys at the school bus stop , in my mismatched pj's -top blue with yellow striped cats and purple bottoms with stars . The teen's dog shredded the blue & yellow cat bottoms. I'm thankful I don't have to dress up for school run ...well we do leave at 7.50am.

Today, we head to Sydney for my next round of chemotherapy tomorrow . I am beyond thankful DH's nephew moved from Sunshine Coast to the neighbouring farm just over a month ago. He feeds our dogs, our cat and keeps an eye* one everything.

I am also bald I very thankful for warm hats and head wrap hacks. Yesterday I learnt how to recycle an old  t-shirt into turban type head wrap. There are so many tutorials on you tubes to guide me.
I like this one too.

Linking in with Kate's Thankful Thursday What are you thankful for today ?

(*When we went to Sydney for my surgery we had to pack up the dog & her kennel to Grandpa's in Sydney, the cat to my friend's (in Sydney) and arrange for another neighbour to keep an eye on the farm ...during which time the Rural Crimes squad cut our gate padlock to get access to a different neighbour's farm for an investigation into neglected stock plus other matters.They came back a second time when we were back in Sydney the next time.)

Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Wordless Wednesday ~ I ran 14km and got Smurfed

Target reached

I got smurfed by a hawt bodied Blue Smurf - it didn't wash off either ! They must have been freezing in just body paint !

So grateful for my training partner Treadmill !

Read More

Monday, 13 August 2012

The Nude Nutt Farm.

I keep wondering - how did I get here ?

Exactly two months ago today I underwent a mammogram and ultrasound . Before I set foot out the examination room I knew it was very bad most likely not good news. The vibes and the drawn out explanations of why I shouldn't worry of course I did !

The next day, 'Breast cancer' with an immediate biopsy was hardly the news was I was expecting. Still, we dealt with it and a week later I had surgery. I've recovered pretty well.

Two weeks and three days ago I had my first chemotherapy cycle, with a guaranteed 100% side of hair loss within 2 - 4 weeks. Pretty much all body hair is lost , in time.

I knew what to expect because of the Breast cancer network Australia's BCNA Fact Sheets on hair loss.

Yesterday, morning I knew it was closing in - head hair was falling out in the 1000's alarming amounts ,  noticeably only to me, thankfully ! (I Goggled it to be sure but we have on average over 100, 000 hairs on our head.*)

I still wore a hooded top and my cap to make sure (no one else wore my hair in the windy conditions).I'm just grateful it lasted the distance of the City to Surf

DH drove home from Sydney to Dubbo last night. If I had known then, the amount of mess moulting hair made, I'd have gone for a haircut yesterday, right after I crossed the line. (Loose hair is still all over the bathroom from this mornings moult..)

We dropped the boys at school . My dear, sweet husband said he wanted to get his hair cut too, as a measure of support. I made sure I explained to them I was getting all my haircut off and so was Daddy...just like Ben , their adult cousin, who lives across the paddock on Grandpa's farm.

The hairdresser I wanted was not open. The next , across the road, wanted $20 for DH & $27 for me - for exactly the same cut #1 all over and shorn off completely.We settled on another hair & beauty Salon , two blocks away, where Sam and Joel have had haircuts before. It was $10 each for a clipper cut.

Nice.Neat.Quick ! No-one else was in the hair dressing salon at the time of my buzz cut. The girl was lovely. After it was over, in under 10 mins, I slipped my beautiful beanie straight on. He normally gets #4 clippers, we got matching #1 .

DH went and bought himself a new Akbura hat - he earned it !

I was ok. I'm still ok. It is just hair and it means the chemo is working. I'll be bald , most likely more than six months to year. It will grow back, eventually.

It feels much better now, I am not shiny bald yet. I couldn't shave it because there is still a great risk of an infection with a nick. My scalp was so sensitive last night and this morning. It feels so different , still slightly sensitive but definitely an improvement on the moulting.
Friday is my next cycle of Chemo. Onwards.

Ben's Dad, ( BIL) came up with a new name for our farm "Nude Nutt Farm" . BIL is looking pretty shaggy himself , so maybe it's his turn next the shearing shed with Ben's clippers.

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.*

29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
(NIV Bible -
Matthew 10:29-31)

Tonight this verse and devotion gives me great inspiration ...I don't have to be afraid, or feel alone , for He is watching over me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Sunday, 12 August 2012

Crossing the line

Today, I completed the 14km - Sydney City to Surf (with 85,000 others) in very chilly and windy conditions . We also got a light sprinkle of rain and a little sunshine .

I took it easy and found a pace partner in another Team World Vision runner....walker.

We crossed the line in about 2hrs.

Last night before I went to bed I checked my target hero meter and I'd already crossed the line @ $1000. I was so excited.

It was the best feeling ever to go to sleep knowing, thanks to the generous donations of family and friends from everywhere, I had reached my $1000 target for World Vision Australia . Thank you all so much xoxox 1000 times over. So many families will be helped to have a better life and lives saved.

They emailed me already

Together, you have raised almost $40,000 which is truly tremendous!  Through the Multiplying Gift Appeal this is multiplied by up to 10.  That's almost $400,000 worth of food aid and relief essentials that can distributed to children and families in urgent need in countries like Kenya. 

We caught the train in and another friend M met up with us after the race. On the way back to her car I saw some people from National Breast Cancer Foundation (NBCF - fund research for prevention and cure) ...actually the race Sports Fundraising Manager who manages the team runners.I told her I'd like to run for them next year, in hot pink. She gave me her card : )

My friend had misplaced her car but we found it . How serendipitous was meeting that lady out of the 100,000 plus people at Bondi , as we wandered about looking for M's car !

I also met up with the gorgeous Grace, from With Some Grace (she ran the whole way) and Tat @Mum in Search came down to say hello too.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Thursday, 9 August 2012

Thankful for rolling with laughter.

Sometimes when we are struggling it is hard to be thankful. I love joining in with Kate's Thankful Thursday to remind me to keep looking.

Today I'm thankful for

1. Laughter and friends who share good humour. Laughter really is the best medicine.

2. That we made the decision early last term to let my five year olds (now 6) start catching the school bus. It would have been so much more difficult emotionally {guilt} to do so I had to after my diagnosis.

3. Especially thankful for the people who have sponsored me in the City to Surf this Sunday. I am running (and walking) to raise the $1000 I pledged for World Vision.

You can still pledge a donation here and I'd be even more thankful.Even $5-$10 is worth $50 to $100 in terms of World Vision multiplying gifts appeal.

4. For spare rolls ... enough said.

I am equally appalled that a certain KFC left the 'Ladies' bereft , last night.

5. For bed head and bad hair days because it means I still have mine. These days, like the hairs on my head {actually even down there} are numbered but I'm as ready as I can be. I'll be cursing if I still have to shave my legs.

What are you thankful for today ?

Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Tuesday, 7 August 2012

Wordless Wednesday ~ Wheels on the bus



I love this page about funny and seriously cool school buses.

PS: Reverse entry this week , so first will be last. Please visit other WW'ers.

PPS: This Sunday I aim to complete in :) City to Surf in Sydney - I am now at $500, half way to $1000 I've committed to raise for World Vision - I still need more sponsors. Donations are tax deductible -  
Onwards and upwards everyone - could you give up one takeaway coffee or lunch today - donate $5 -$10 to World Vision and feed a family for a month or two.