Thursday, 14 October 2010

Rainbow babies

Over the years I have discovered in some circles babies born after the loss of baby (during pregnancy, at birth or shortly after) are called Rainbow babies.

I found this somewhere (twice) ...

Rainbow Babies" is the understanding that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope."
  • Christians believe that God sent a rainbow to prove there would be no more floods after Noah.
  • Some Aboriginal tribes celebrate the Rainbow Serpent as the creator of the all being and the rainbow a sign of fertility.

A rainbow baby or babies signify a promise - promise for parents, promise for the future, and promise for the world. Unfortunately , there will always be the pain of loss, but mostly there will also always be joy that follows it, just like the rainbow after the rain.

I honestly felt completely devastated, especially despairing that I would never see our rainbow baby considering our 14 years of infertility. It was my baby loss friends who taught me to hope again and encouraged me to try IVF.

Sometimes the rainbow appears soon after the storm , though sometimes we have to wait a while to see it. In our case it was after a 22 month long , rough storm.

When our twins arrived (a month early by emergency C/S) we were so looking forward to seeing our rainbow babies and hearing those first cries.

All over the world we see the same rainbows, the colours lengthen into the light, stretching as the sky beams a gleaming multicoloured arc of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet.

While I miss ~Charlotte~ immensely , I have to believe my greatest loss was also my greatest gain in many other ways. Not withstanding the dear friendships I have made , most significantly her two little brothers.

I cannot fathom life without them. Like in the dark, terrible, saddest days after we said goodbye to Charlotte I couldn't imagine life without her.

In the last few weeks I've read of many families joining the babyloss club. It's heartbreaking.
I was reminded yesterday of a great book I read after lossing Charlotte.

Always a part of me: Surviving Childbearing Loss

Author: Amanda Collinge, Sue Daniel, Heather Grace Jones
Publisher: ABC Books

It contains a collection of stories written by both mothers and fathers on surviving the loss of a baby.

My rainbow boys are my happy place and their laughter is music to a mother's broken heart.

I wrote this as part of October International Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month , Oct 15th is Internationalworld wide day of remembrance.

PS : The term rainbow babies has other meanings too.
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Anonymous said...

I am so glad you have your rainbow babies.


•´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Trish.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´• said...

@PP (hugs) So am I xo ; one day maybe you can tell me about your lost babies.

Tenielle said...

I wrote a very similar post a few months back that I'm still incredibly proud of. I love this topic, especially now I'm pregnant with my "rainbow" baby :) I prefer to think of Ianto (my son) as a rainbow though - he was beautiful but didn't last very long, only a few people saw him and were astounded by his beauty, etc... I love all these definitions :)

Mum-me said...

Rainbow Babies is such a perfect description. Your Rainbow Babies are just gorgeous and you are truly blessed.

Kristen said...

I'm glad you posted this. I have lost 3 babies to miscarriage. If I had carried 2 of those babies to term we wouldn't have our 2 boys. Sometimes I feel guilty about that in a weird way. Beautiful post.

Jenn said...

And what beautiful rainbow babies they are. Love the pictures you picked out to go with this post - adorable!

tiff(threeringcircus) said...

Beautiful Trish. Lighting a candle for Charlotte tonight.

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