Today, as I drove home from shopping in town, I noticed a well dressed lady walking - clearly not for leisure or exercise - with her hand bag and a car following slowly . I passed them with caution and pulled into the driveway of a nearby farm [gate] up the road.
I thought I saw the lady hurl herself and handbag at the car in the middle of road. The car turned and drove off . After it passed me, I went to check she was ok and offered to drive her somewhere. (It was 17km walk into town along country road and not particularly safe anytime , especially once you got to the highway). I was 3km from home.
She jumped in without hesitation (I must look safe) maybe she was scared ? relieved?. She was a bit teary , said she was in a mess but ok. He had told her to get out of the car , so she did. "To stand up for myself !"
She wanted to go to the local train / bus station and travel 750kms far west (from her partner) to her sister. She had recently lost her Mum (Diagnosed with Cancer and passed away within 6 weeks) , was grieving and had some issues with partner over her Mum's death and being away. She chatted on the 15min trip back into town, mostly I listened. She told me her name and a bit about what was happening and wanting to stand up for herself and said she probably did /said the wrong thing too - made him angry and frustrated.
By the time we got to town , she had changed her mind. I think she would have lucked out on the bus /train anyway [I checked it is a 2 day trip - and she would have to go to Sydney first.]
She asked that I drop her at the Bank (because she had thrown the credit card at him as he'd demanded it back - what I saw when I thought she was throwing something at the car) and said she might have a bite to eat and think things over.
I did offer her a safe place if needed ; she told me where she lives. She didn't say she was in any danger and she was happy to leave her two children ( < 5yrs) with him (they were at preschool)
Why did I stop - because last night I finished Liane Moriarty's (a review for another day)
big
little
lies
One of the themes Liane's book plugs into is domestic violence.
The Lady was literally describing her behaviour like the character in the book.
Mind you , I was so focused on the lady I couldn't tell you the colour or make of the car , only that is was a 4WD. I didn't see the man. I'd make a pathetic witness...
Who knows what goes on behind closed suburban doors or bushy farm gates or right in the middle of country back road ?
In a few days, I am wondering if I should drop a card in her letter box (She lives on a property, not in suburbia) so I doubt I could drive by and see her out and about.
It's still bugging me - what would you do ?
♥
musertegan 52p · 559 weeks ago
It's a hard situation and good on you for stopping and helping her out.
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kuddles 14p · 559 weeks ago
You are a kind soul and great person. Many wouldn't have stopped. I would like to think that I would have stopped.
The card sounds like a lovely idea but in the back of my mind I worry about what 'type' of man he is. Could there be a cryptic way to leave a message? Maybe just "thinking of you, please call if you ever need anything" and your name/number.
I'm saying a little prayer that she is okay. xx
@handbagmafia_1 · 559 weeks ago
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claireyhewitt01 44p · 559 weeks ago
I would like to think I would stop, and do just as you did, but until we are all in that exact situation you just never know.
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leeannewalker1 55p · 558 weeks ago
I think a card in the letterbox is a good idea. I'd be bright and breezy and not allude to her stress or the car incident. Just a little 'hello' and suggestion for coffee, cake and a chat. It's an olive branch she may want and need, but unfortunately I think there's a high probability that she won't want to meet to discuss her problems. Domestic violence is so insidious it often affects the victim's ability to be independent and proactive. :)
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teapotsandtractors 55p · 558 weeks ago
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PKM -Jess · 558 weeks ago
My dad monitored everything, and recorded us, recorded my mum on video, tracked her in her car. These controlling men do freaky things. Good on you for caring so much! Here for FYBF
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jessnewman877 75p · 558 weeks ago
I wouldn't think it would be wrong to drop a note in the letter box and ask if she wants to catch up for a coffee? Even if her partner sees it first, if you don't write anything obvious, I'm sure he will just think you're a friend saying hi. It would be good to keep a door open for her.
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