Friday, 23 January 2009

Face space at six degrees

*waves* Where have I been ?

Well , we are back from a few days away on the NSW Central Coast. The beach was sensational and I even dared to get wet in the surf.

Today, I risked my 'old' bones and went water skiing for the first time *shrugs* since I can't remember ???

Sorry I have been neglecting my google reader (for too long) and your blogs. Seriously, I miss you all. I've had limited online time most of this month. I haven't forgotten you or your fabulous blogs ...nor have I traded you in on my latest addiction Facebook. Spring and Summer are when I seem to busy from dawn until the witching hours of the night.

Oh Facebook ... I signed up a long time ago to keep vaguely in touch with a few friends. To be honest for months I rarely even checked it.Then one day something clicked .I began to browse the status of my friends , leave comments and get cheeky. It was fun and interesting.

I *grins* finally worked out how to use the damn thing too.I couldn't get the hang of twitter at all.

I started to discover more people I knew on Facebook. One night when my cousin was visiting I introduced him to Facebook and he told me, laughing, his mother called it 'FACE SPACE' - she has no idea of either . I laughed hard too. Then we searched for his sisters to add as his friends. We found one easily ... too easily.

I searched for a few others and I am so amazed at how small the world is you remember that song it's a small world after all...well it is. Freakily so.

A few weeks ago I found a very special friend on Facebook. We have reconnected in the cyber world so far.

A few days I was thinking about family and my cousins we hadn't seen in a long time (since my grandmother's funeral over 6 years ago).One was my flower girl (almost 19 yrs ago) I found her in amongst about first 50 - 'relatively' easily - her smile unmistakable , beautiful eyes hidden behind sunnies. Then her brother D, and my Aunty M (who had remarried). I rejoiced when they added me as their friends.

Then I thought about niece on my husband's side. I search her name ... R M over '150' , one of the them had a profile picture of a cute little girl . I knew it wasn't my niece's child but I clicked anyway in case it was her 'niece'... then I saw a 'friend in common' ... my male cousin, D - I had just added as a friend ... too freaky. He had a friend with same name as my husband niece ( totally unrelated and besides he has never met my husband's niece) and This is what they reckon about six degrees of separation. The theory states that everybody on this planet is separated by only six other people...

I saw my cousin's status had a comment from a name I 'recognised' - he was a pastor from our old Church, who came to our wedding , and so many more coincidences.

I have clicked on other random people too to see a friend in common , two people I know from playgroups who went to my primary and/or highschool ... a fair distance from where I live now. Not something you talk about in general conversation I guess where you went to school.

Another of my friend, G has a sister who found me not through her sister but through another lady who has twins.

A fair few blogging friends are my Facebook friends, they know my real name and other info.I have resisted the temptation to just add anyone as a friend.

I found a whole bunch of "kids" I went to school with but I didn't be "friend" them - they were never really my friends . Though I can seriously see from a tiny profile picture some have not changed much (in 24 yrs) others well ...enough said

So where is this all going you are wondering ...I guess what it comes down to is that I have to question my intentions with this blog and Facebook.

Do I want them intertwined ?

Do you ever have this question, like, where am I going or what do I plan on doing with this?

What is this I’m trying to create? I like my blog to be anonymous but Facebook is very much a public diary. I love the connections and knowing what my friends are up to and their status ...moods and all. I share this and that but not my blog on there.

My blog is a place where I journal random stuff, showcase my thoughts *cough* and share a little in the days of my life ? I have fun but a mix of serious stuff too.

I don’t even know if I am I ready to share more of my 'blog' with my FB 'friends' and FB family.

Though , I have nothing to hide, as my FB = Bloggy pals know I am real deal. I am nothing special and my family, friends aren't unique or famous (though infinitely special in case they are reading) but you then you can’t blog about stuff in case they think it is about them (like the song says probbaly think this song is about you - It may be ) or stuff you don't wish to share with them.

Which why at the moment I can't write about emotional or sensitive things that could be very bloggable fodder.

I still toy with the idea I need an anonymous blog but then I would have 'two' blogs and two identities and twice the responsibility ( LOL I have enough of THAT already) .Honestly it just doesn’t sound very appealing to me. Messy in fact. I know a few bloggers who can do it ;)

Besides who could I tell - I wouldn’t tell you about my other blog because then it would not be anonymous.

So for now I guess I won’t write about those really personal things and things I want to vent about in case someone reads it and gets upset...even if it is my blog.

I am normally a private person in real life. I don't seek advice much if at all. I feel a little lost about a lot of things right now . I have a clue as to what direction my GPS is still in the box to go in.

It is when I lose my direction that I spend days doing other things than blogging...well that and when the sun is shining.

My life is a little crazy right now but I love it.

"Friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine." (Thomas Jefferson)

PS: I don't understand MYspace at all but I know it rules the lives of teenagers and especially my own 15 yr old son and his friends.

PPS: Welcome to WTBAY and ICLW visitors. I promise to return visit you asap.

PPPS: Pictures ? well you have to wait till I unpack my camera cord.

Never miss a post


Jenn said...

Well, these can be tricky questions. I have chosen to keep my blog anonymous - only a few of my closest friends in real life know about it. I do have a facebook account to, but I have only friended folks I know in real life since I post pictures of my daughter on there. This is how I feel most comfortable with things, it seems like you're doing the same, huh?

Glad to hear you got out there and water skied! It's so much fun!

Melody said...

I *so* totally understand what you mean about whether to share the 'blog' part of me with the 'FB' part of me. I know I don't want to share my blog with my FB friends - bar a few of course... My blog is more 'my' private space which is who I really am - it is not something I wish to share with people I went to High School with! And somehow, I think I regard a lot of my blog friends more highly than my FB friends.

Amanda said...

My blog is anonymous. Only 2 people that I know IRL know about my blog, and that was honestly kind of an accident. My blog is my place to be myself and not worry about judgement from the people that I actually see face to face. So that's why I don't link my blog to FB.

mountainmama said...

Well, being part of each other's overlap, I think you know I know exactly what you mean! (LOL...know what I mean?)

You're my only blogging "friend" on FB (so far). I don't choose to promote my blog on FB, and only a few of my off-line friends and family know I have a blog (and I don't know if any of them actually read it....they don't comment). Even so, I maintain a level of discretion on my blog (AND on FB, AND on my personal life).

I think my deepest darkest thoughts only by myself, or with a trusted person when I need to vent.

If I DO choose to vent online, it is usually through the medium of IM or chat, which is not public - I'm sure some tech-head is going to tell me how it is stored somewhere and accessible by...blah blah, but for now I feel that is the "safest" and most discreet method to maintain my privacy.

One of the many lessons I learned out of the last few years is the importance of being myself. FB, blog, real life etc are all ME, but represent different aspects of myself - eg. FB is fun, often a bit shallow and flippant, but almost always playful, whereas the blog tends to be more introspective, thoughtful, musing. So, the blog is not something I would want or expect casual acquaintances to read (though I'm okay with total strangers reading it...hmmm, still getting my head around!)

Cathy said...

Facebook is addictive lol - I do mis the two because I figure so many of my friends know about my blog anyway, and besides it is "public" in the sense that it is on the web, and anyone could virtually stumble across it!

would LOVE to have a secret blog that I could use to vent, but like you said, who would read it? wouldn't be able to tell anyone about it! and imagine the repercussions if it were ever discovered!!

Joh said...

I have become an open book. All are connected, FB, Myspace, blog etc. I didn't set out with that intention, but it all connects up.

I generally add anyone I know on FB. I am not sure where to draw lines. I am an inclusive person and I just don't believe anything online is a private space... which makes me inhibited all the time... it's a struggle for me to make a strong statement. Which is probably why my blog is so boring! I start off with a strong opinion and then the voices kick in... what if a student reads this... what if a parent reads this... what if my aunty/daughter/son/mum/friend/lady up the road... ah the dilema! :-)

Trying to model this to the kids at school though... they have no desire,skill or ability to remain anon, so have to teach them how to reveal selectively, while I am learning.

Louisa said...

I know what you mean! I have kept them separate...but that's just me maybe...??

MrsJoyner said...

You are incredible. I've read before but I just re-found your blog. Your boys, beautiful, your story gut wrenching but with a very hopeful ending. Thank you so much for the comment on my blog and I will be following your story along.

Soralis said...

I love facebook! But I do keep my Blog private. I don't want my mom to know how much I complain about her! :)

I think I like some of my Blog friends better!

Take care

Mistress B said...

No easy answers to your questions. I hope you figure it out soon


M+B said...

I keep them seperate. I just don't feel comfortable sharing my blog with my IRL friends (and family).

I use FB mostly as a way to stay in touch with my friends overseas and my 'large' family... but I'm more likely to throw the odd comment to my 'bloggy' friends these days :-)

Judith "Jlo" Quinton said...

Loved this post, Trish, and the insight it gave into you. Whether you think your blog is truly personal, I certainly find clear glimpses of you and those glimpses tell me I really like what I see.
I understand about the issue of privacy and not sharing certain things in the blogworld, esp. when you are connected to a family.
At this point in my life, though, I have full permission from all, and the space and distance from my family, to be totally myself and as revealing as I choose to be...which is quite revealing, as you know.
To everything a season, I always say.
Your thoughts on Facebook were interesting. I have been wondering if I should be on there, but frankly just didn't want to put out the effort to be on one more network - on Blogger, active on Twitter, which I love, by the way.
I will give it more thought...maybe when the book editing is done.
Thanks, as always, for your prayers.
Much appreciated.

Widdle Shamrock said...

People know I blog and I have 3 real life friends who visit.

The rest are online friends I have known over the years.

Though I haven't blogged anything that I wouldn't want them to know (YET, I think)

I am on Facebook too.

Glad you had a great time away. I look forward to seeing the photos.

jeanie said...

"I found a whole bunch of "kids" I went to school with but I didn't be "friend" them - they were never really my friends"

That is a conundrum for me also - I have a few school friends on Facebook, but I am in a quandry about adding those who I knew in that they were at school with me but not in the friend circle.

tiff said...

Well, You are special and unique and you are the real deal. That's why so many people love you... me included.

Debbie said...

I can't figure out Twitter at all. And I am resisting Facebook because I do NOT need another addiction:)

Crazed Mom said...

So funny. I have reconnected with my cousins on my mom's side too. It's been pretty cool. If it wasn't for FB I'd never know what two of my brothers were up to.

I noticed today a visit from the town in Pennsylvania that my gradnparents lived in when they were alive. I was thinking I might want to be careful about my content.

lostintranslation said...

Ah, summer, that's still so far away for us in the Northern Hemisphere...

And for Facebook - I guess I'm still in what you described as your early stage - I usually forget to check it... but yes, I keep that and my (anonymous) blog completely separate.


Laura said...

I'm battling the FB addiction, and asking those questions, too. *some* of my family have my blog address, but I don't know that many have ever read much of it. I DO have my blog address on my FB page, but again, there's not much overlap...people on FB just don't take the time to check out blogs that least in my realm of FB friends (how DID I get up to 357 so quickly there?!?).

I think the questions you've asked are good ones, and I can't even answer them for myself yet...good luck figuring it all out!!

The Bumbles said...

Hey Trish - funny how protective we become of our blogs isn't it? My hubby is on Face Book and I have no idea if he has posted our blog site there or not. I don't go around telling people about it but it is there if they happen upon it. Nothing I'm ashamed of on it - but it is a nice safe place to do whatever we want without worrying what those we love think, etc. Speaking of blogs, we have given you an award today - so come on over to pick it up.

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