Friday, 10 May 2013

Why I don't do Yoga and Pardon Me

Every day we all face embarrassing situations .

I know the feeling of social anxiety associated with the prospect of facing an embarrassing situation like being in crowded room and not hearing what is going on. The fear of saying something stupid or talking over the top of someone else.

For me it is such a common and powerful emotion in everyday life with my hearing impairment.

I've had moderate to severe hearing loss in my left ear for about 25 years. I am not sure exactly why, it happened after minor surgery , though I had a history of ear infections.

The hearing in my right ear is not as bad but still a moderate to severe loss , with my Bone anchored hearing aid - (BAHA) I get by. I have had a lot of surgery on my ears and there isn't much more they can do.

I know in a crowded room voices are blurred and words become indecipherable. Everything is indistinct and it's annoying. Sometimes I don't hear the wait staff, nor the people I am having dinner with,when we go out. I can hear reasonably well at home but I still stuff up and miss things. I mishear things.It causes tension.

The TV and radio up loud annoys everyone else, and me, when they always turn it down or I am screaming over the top of the din "to SHUTUP be quiet", so I can hear my show.

Sometimes I worry my family and friends are tired of me saying,
“ What did you say ? I can’t hear you.”
"Please talk louder "
" Pardon "
" Can you repeat it again"
"I missed that ...what was the punch line" ... I don't get the joke. I don't laugh when I should.

I get embarrassed by people (especially shop assistants) looking at me as if I am stupid when I ask them to repeat something simple because they mumble ... "cash out ?"

I know I feel embarrassed after saying stupid things when I don't hear the 'right' words's not only embarrassing it's socially isolating. I try to avoid it.

I know I get really embarrassed when people say I talk too loud ... Really ! I can't help it.
I hate people saying "Don't worry ...or I'll tell you later " in response, to my repeated attempts to clarify what they have said.

My BAHA sound processor sits slightly under my hair and is noticeable from behind, though people may not know what it is, a lot more people do now, like Cochlear implants. Even when people know they get exasperated with me.

So I want you to know I'm sharing this in case you know someone with hearing impairment. Give them a break and speak clearly.

On a lighter note ...
Last week I started the Encore* program - it involves a little hydrotherapy exercises , arm exercises to help us recover our range of arm movement after surgery and prevent lymphoedema.

Last night in the pool this was potentially embarrassing ...

Then we had a Tai Chi instructor give us a few pointers ...uh oh - awkward - imagine this except I was upright. So embarrassing and trying to not makes you look even more awkward.

That is why I know I don't do Yoga or Pilates.

*ywca encore is a free 8-week program for women who have experienced breast cancer.

ywca encore has the unique approach of combining specially designed exercises with a supportive environment.
ywca encore has been operating in Australia for over 25 years and has already helped thousands of women.
ywca encore is a national program of the YWCA of Australia, delivered through our member associations.

 Have you an embarrassing story ?

Linking up with Things I know.

I'm taking part in the Mother's Day Classic raising funds for breast cancer research. Every extra dollar raised goes towards vital research into the prevention and cure of breast cancer. I'll be participating or volunteering along with 120,000 Australians nationwide who are making a difference on Mother's Day . You can help me too by donating online