Friday, 12 August 2011

Have I got it all wrong

I know it has been a week of highs and lows.

I know you shouldn't find out your Aunty (my Dad's sister) has passed away via a Facebook status , your cousin's, at midnight. A status so full of angst because she had a strained relationship with her mother and people didn't think she had a right to grieve her. Long story and not mine to tell.

My Dad passed away 6 yrs ago this month when he was 63, his sister was 64 when she died. Both too young - she had some form of lung cancer but she was apparently ok the last time her brother (my uncle) spoke to her 2 months ago.

I feel bad I hadn't seen her for a while.When she was my grandmother's (who passed away 8yrs ago) carer I saw her more often. I've had a good relationship with my Aunty since childhood.

No-one informed our family, and her younger brother couldn't get in touch to find any information when someone told him, because they found out also through Facebook, she had taken ill suddenly.

I know Motherhood the Muscial was hysterical and outrageously funny . The 'scene' was a baby shower for Amy, her friends talked about childbirth, pelvic floors ... the  'I leak' song had the whole audience laughing out loud . They mentioned sex after childbirth , how annoying children can really be but at the same time celebrated those poignant moments you wouldn't miss for the world.

With no fancy scenery or expensive props - just 4 ladies on stage with a great script , 20 hilarious songs - ('The kids are finally asleep' was a hit) and a little dancing (with brooms & trolleys)  they had us laughing the whole 90mins. I loved it and it was so true. If you get a chance to see it - DO IT ! , don't miss it. Go and like their Facebook page.

I know the decision about selling our home hasn't come easily , I know it is just bricks & mortar but it holds so many memories good & bad.Packing up the dreams (and Charlotte's roses) we have planted here will be incredibly hard and heart wrenching. I know I have to start taking cuttings and hope they strike and grow.

My husband decided suddenly this Tuesday/Wednesday to move all the boxes & clutter in our garage into storage. A little job turned into a monumental task and mess. I don't know how we get it in order for open house tomorrow. I don't know what he has taken .I guess like the song says you don't know what you got till it's gone ...

I know today is going to be BUSY (and yes I am shouting).

I know the agent did not inform us he wasn't coming to OPEN house last week and we spent 4-5 hrs making the house spotless for no reason. Not so much the cleaning I object to , but hiding the clutter and everything else just for the OPEN house that was unnecessary.

I know I  am looking forward to the intrepid adventures both on the farm and in the caravan , right now it seems a great escape from life here. It's just hard getting to that point.

I know our caravan holiday will be a matter of careful planning and a choice of destinations....but we have no plans as yet. It feels wrong though we do have 3 weeks till we go !

Still, the best laid plans ...It all seems so far away at the moment. Beyond reach. Just a sweet dream of adventures and an escape.

What do you know ?
What have you got planned for the weekend ?

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