Monday, 14 March 2016

On the day I die

I've had many
aha moment (s)

The definition of an aha moment is a point in your life when an important insight, choice or decision is made.

[an instant at which the solution to a problem becomes clear
Collins English Dictionary -]

in my life ; none have made me wealthy - though enriching personally.

Click for larger version (Infographic from Funders and Founders)

Trigger warning below ...death and dying. I wasn't sure if I would write this.

Last week - was a very sad week for my family as (we) they waited all week for my uncle to pass away.  With an all clear in December, no-one saw it coming.

Metastic, terminal cancer, with excruiatingly painful neuropathic pain.   Severe pain that was largely not relieved by strong opioids, or palliative radiation. He endured six-seven weeks of it , from start to the end in hospital , save for a few days at home. His Drs did everything they could, family members stayed with his wife and held him close as his life ebbed in the last week.

Fifty-eight years young, He will be very much missed. he was only 9 yrs older than I was.  Tuesday I received the first call , my brother and his wife, who didn't think they would even make the hour's journey to say goodbye. I was torn because as much as I wanted to say my goodbye, it was a five-six hour journey, they said I wouldn't make it.

Each day I got sad heart breaking updates that he wouldn't make the day or through the night. Friday in the early hours of the morning , his 'dash' on Earth ended.

Last week, I also watched (on catch ABC Iview) the Euthanasia debate. I know my decision now should the time come. I told my husband.

It was my aha moment , both .

I am also a fierce supporter of Palliative care . I belong to a local community advocate group pushing for better Palliative care across NSW - Push for Palliative.

I've attended a few meetings where with Community advocate Dr Yvonne McMaster (a retired specialist palliative care Dr and OAM). She shared with us why it is important that the NSW government provides more specialist palliative care services for cancer patients throughout NSW. I've spoken to her on several occasions and spoken at a CanAct information event.

For more information and to be part of the change, visit
Join the CanAct community and find out how you can help at

I also chanced upon this article written 2 weeks ago.

On the Day I die -

Don’t miss the chance to dance with them while you can.

Don’t let your life be stolen every day by all that you believe matters, because on the day you die, much of it simply won’t.

Yes, you and I   will die one day.

But before that day comes: let us live.

Life is not short... Life is the longest activity you'll ever engage in (then you die).

Lastly , this song :

(this is a touching rendition)

One day, I had an aha moment as we were driving in the car and it played on CD, it wasn't the first time I heard this song. It was enlightening - I'd been feeling cheated, robbed and wondered why it ever happened (falling pregnant naturally after 14 yrs) only to say goodbye before we got to say hello.

I suddenly knew ...sure I could have missed the pain of losing our baby girl but I'd have missed the dance. (chance to be pregnant and subsequently go on to birth our twin boys by IVF) .

Since then it has never failed to bring bittersweet memories to my mind of a very special girl who taught me what it was to love and to be loved .

I Must Confess