Monday, 31 December 2012

Keeping pace

I stepped into 2012 packing boxes with a tree change on the horizon.The promise of a busy year ahead as the Little Drummers prepared to start kindergarten .

We welcomed two new puppies, Jed and Dashi and Ziggy, our cat disappeared ...for good.

Every puppy should have a boy ~ Erma Bombeck
Life was good and the big day arrived Feb 6th with 4 sets of twins joining them - 5 pairs in total.
Sadly, little Jed was only with us 6 weeks.

In March we survived a white ant invasion (termites) - a lot of our stuff was damaged , some irreparably. Keep Calm - yes I nailed that ! In the end I resolved it's just stuff.

My sights were set on running the City to Surf in April and I started training for an event I'd wanted to complete for years. I chose to sponsor Team World Vision

May my DH bought me this battery operated device for Mother's day - never thinking how significant it would be a month later.
June was the most defining moment of my life to date... my world shattered when I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer  and I had a double mastectomy a week later.

The Little Drummers turned six on July 1st and less than 4 weeks later I started my first round of 4 chemotherapy infusions, in Sydney.

There were and are miles to go ...

I was focused so much on my goal to run [and walk] the City to Surf in August .Two weeks after my first chemo - I crossed the line. It was so gratifying , especially to raise $1000  for World Vision with the help of my family, friends and online community. I got to hug the gorgeous Grace at the finish line.

In September I kept moving forward to build a better life for myself , dwelling less on the negative ...well I tried. One of the reasons I'm blogging about my breast cancer journey is to raise awareness. Encouraging women to have a good feel every chance they get is so important.

October, a different round of Chemo {Paclitaxil weekly x 12- only 2 more to go} began at my local Cancer Care Centre. We were both so grateful that the exhaustive traveling [700-800km return] to Sydney for treatment was over.

I started to feel stronger , as this current chemo is less intense and by the end of November I was at the half way mark. We also welcomed new calves to our little herd.

December did it arrive and end so fast ?

I have struggled to know what to write the last 6 months without whinging too much about chemo and surgery side effects or banging on about breast cancer awareness. No-one would be much interested and I'd be wasting my breath. I don't need sympathy and I never asked for anything except understanding.

I know of others doing it much tougher so I've felt reluctant to say how I am feeling physically and emotionally.

Cancer is complex and I had no idea before I was diagnosed how complicated breast cancer is many different types, stages and treatments.

I am TWO infusions off finishing chemotherapy {insert wild fist pumping} - Chemo today was postponed till Wednesday because it's a non public holiday , Public holiday for the hospital. I will still continue a different infusion every 3 weeks for another 10 months.

I have felt very overwhelmed,  I feel crushed by the significance of so many unrelated things and despair over things I can't change. Many things are a mystery to me.

2012 has not been the best of years for me but here I am on the threshold of a New Year.

As I stumble leap into 2013 I know that there are good things ahead that will bring me joy, happiness and contentment. Sometimes when our life has been shaken up it's hard to believe good is ahead...

Life is full of seasons and we weather all manner of storms* in any given year. I enter a different season by the hand a faithful God, who leads me on.

The knowledge that He cares for me and holds together the pieces of my brokenness, keeps me afloat .

My blog helps keep the memories ...because right now it is shocking !

Did 2012 get the 'thumbs up' from you ?
What was your highlight ?
Are you ready to leap into 2013 ?

*By the way I really wish it would RAIN !