Saturday, 9 April 2011

Grateful Saturday- The Dance


Life, loss, grief and love intertwined.  

And /or  not so grateful really to be reminded at how fragile life is , with anniversaries remembered of precious little angels and another little life taken so soon.

I've read a few poignant posts and comments about experiences of loss this week.
Also, remembering my own bittersweet memories of 7 years ago. 
After 12 years infertility, I considered with awesome wonder the thought I might actually be pregnant for the first time. 

Almost to the day ... Easter 2004.
600km from home, in remote country town, on a 8000 acre farm.
No one to tell or I wanted to tell in case I was wrong.
Not even my DH.
No hope of a pregnancy test kit , we were 75km from nearest pharmacy. 
I had to wait it out for 3 days.

In the end all did not go as planned.
Almost 27 weeks was all I had.
It was oft implied , by well meaning people , I would better.never. to have been pregnant to lose our daughter, tragically stillborn at 6 months. 
Never.

I am forever grateful that I had the chance and for The dance. Even though I was filled with terrible pain for years months after she died. I wouldn't have missed it for the world.
I can still smile.

How could I have known you'd ever say goodbye
And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance



PS Garth is my favourite cowboy.

Grateful too , my husband had a day's paid work this week and more grateful we got a lot accomplished in our garden makeover for the big sell. We (HE) planted 30 trees/shrubs, removed a ute load of weeds and spread a thousand shovelfuls of mushroom compost and mulch.

Grateful our teenage son got a new job with, what appears, to be a very good company.
His last job , temporary for 5-6wks , was a little discouraging as the sole employer was a bit dodgy.

So, what's making you smile today?
... Please add a link back to Maxibella in your post. Blog hop to visit other bloggers who are spreading a little sunshine.
  
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