I came across this gem the other day @ Psychoprogs -
Things you would like to say at work, but can't !
It is brilliant !!!
Some of them would be useful anywhere, anytime ...
These are my favourite thirteen but because
- I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
- How about never? Is never good for you?
- I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
- I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.
- I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
- It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying.
- Ahhh…I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.
- I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t give a damn.
- I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
- Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
- It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.
- Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?
- Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
- Chaos, panic, and disorder — my work here is done.
- How do I set a laser printer to stun?